One
full month in hospital and I was bored out of my mind. The first 2weeks I was bed bound and was only
allowed out of bed to go to the toilet or get a shower. The rest of the time if I moved I was taken
back to bed again as I was extremely poorly as I had no energy or strength to
stand up on my own. I had needed support
off nurses to take me to the bathroom as I was extremely weak. I was unable to keep any food or drink down
and it scared me out of my wits not being able to eat or drink properly. When I was in the hospital I was put on saline
drips and was given special drinks to make sure I stayed hydrated. After about a week after my admission I was
starting to be able to manage food but only a few mouthfuls as I had no
appetite. I had fallen out of love with food as it made
me suffer with so much pain I cried until it had passed through me. This pain was caused by all the ulceration in
my mouth as I had massive mouth ulcers and my bowel was also inflamed and
ulcerated too. This inflammation and
ulceration was caused by a Crohn’s disease flare up.
Anyone
with an IBD would understand how debilitating and draining a flare up can be
mentally, emotionally and physically. It
can be extremely painful, you might have to be hospitalised or unable to leave
your bed or heavily medicated.
While
both men and women can suffer from inflammatory bowel disease, but as a woman,
there are a few things I have noticed that are gender specific from help from
the professionals and red faced conversations.
There are a few things that women have to deal with when suffering with
IBD have to put up with:
1. You have more
favourite clothes than an average woman
I
have a few favourite pjs that I love to spend my bad days in. During my period and my bad days I spend more
time lounging around the house in my comfy pjs due to the bloating, pain and
the need to feel comfy. It sometimes
helps me to feel better in myself even with the pain and bloating.
2. It can be a bit
embarrassing when needing to go and use the public toilets
Most
guys seem to be able to go for a poo in public toilets much easier than
females. When you walk into female
public toilets there is always one person complaining just when someone makes a
noise that is not normally made when going for a wee. Or someone complains about the smell in the
toilets due to someone doing a poo. So
for a woman with an IBD in a full blown flare it is not really ideal as it is
embarrassing when someone starts complaining.
3. It can also be
embarrassing having to talk about the toilet to people
Guys
get away laughing and joking when they fart but when women do the same or talk
about bowel habits it is extremely unladylike.
4. You get plagued
with Juice Plus offers more than anyone in your friendship group
Women
Juice Plus sellers seem to target female IBD sufferers and they explain how
“amazing” the natural ingredients are in the capsules which are supposedly
really good for ulcerative colitis or Crohn’s disease.
5. You own more high
waisted clothes than a shop
Some
people with IBD might have to have surgery to remove part of their intestine
and part of the intestine has to be brought out to the abdomen to release the
waste. The surgery can be done to give
the bowel a rest or because part or all of the bowel has had to be removed. Most women with an ostomy live in
high-waisted clothing due to it being secure, supportive and trendy. Those people without an ostomy use
high-waisted clothing to hide the bloating caused by IBD.
6. You have lost
weight is no longer taken as a compliment
Just before my diagnosis of Crohn’s disease in 2013
I had lost so much weight due to a massive flare and my colleagues were
concerned with my well-being. Customers
and other people congratulated me on the weight I was losing. But in my head it was most defintiely not a
compliment as it was not intentional as I knew I was sick but no one believed
me
7. Insulting comments
like “you have put on so much weight” can be even more of an insult
During
a massive IBD flare doctors always give patients steroids to help get their
health back on track again. With
steroids everyone starts commenting on how much weight you have gained instead
of how much you have lost. Other
comments include gerbil or hamster cheeks due to the steroids.
8. “I get that pain
too” is a regular occurrence
When
it comes from someone who also suffers on a daily basis with IBD or another
chronic illness such as arthritis or fibromyalgia that is fine. But when it comes from someone who is
describing period pain against IBD pain it actually takes the piss I cannot
take it no more. Yes I have a lot of
people in work coming about period pains but I know they known I suffer much
worse with my IBD when I am suffering with a flare up. I am sorry but your womb is not the same as a
very ulcerated colon.
9. Doctors do not
take women seriously
Due to stomach cramps being one of the main
symptoms of IBD most doctors try to fob you off with it is just women’s
problems even though we know ourselves it is nothing to do with our period and
it is actually to do with our bowels. Bleeding
is another symptom and some doctors surprisingly does not understand the
difference between blood coming from your rear end and bleeding from your
vagina. This is another reason why
doctors pass it off as women’s problems.
10. You become
extremely understanding to others
Yes
it annoys me when other women compare their symptoms of their period pain to
Crohn’s or Fibromyalgia pain. But over
the years of suffering I have noticed I am a bit more compassionate towards
other women especially when they have to take time off for stomach cramps. My daughter suffers a lot with stomach cramps
and since we have figured out that it was mostly down to allergies (she is only
two but with four food allergies that we are aware of to date and under
investigation for IBD and Coeliac disease due to her symptoms being exactly
similar to both illnesses after taking out everything with any of the allergens
she cannot have). She does know when I am
in pain and she is very compassionate and usually gives in to giving me hugs
and kisses to make me feel better just like I do when she has stomach cramps.
11. You are an
extremely strong person (even when you do not think you are)
On
a daily basis we deal with bloating, cramps, bleeding, fatigue and many other
bowel related things. We gain a lot of
weight, we lose some too, we trial different combinations of medication to stay
at a balance. We have to face surgery,
infusions, injections and we have taken way to many different tablets under the
sun. We also have to deal with rude, judgmental
or inconsiderate people and people who just simple do not understand. We already have to deal with so much as it is
but we are still here and still fighting our way through things.
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